Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Randomize
