Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
