the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
