at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
