apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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