cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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