'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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