I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Randomize
