gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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