I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
