I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
