I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I need a hoe opinion
go on
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
