that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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