I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize