VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
