Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
You dont lie about slip and slides
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
