I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Randomize
