PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Randomize
