She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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