hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
