so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Randomize
