no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
