My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Randomize
