need another drink. this is the easiest way
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
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