FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
