She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize