So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
