so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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