I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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