If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
