Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
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