So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
babies were throwing up all over the place
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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