she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
