ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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