Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize
