we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
