My hair reeks of homosexuality.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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