READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
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