tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Randomize
