can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
