I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Randomize
