Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Randomize
