just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
