when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize
