If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
