Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
You need a sexual gate keeper
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
