I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
