Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
You may now shotgun with the bride
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
