margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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