Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
So much rum. So many feels.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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