Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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