Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
